COVID 19: WHERE IS YOUR HEART, MIAMI?

When the Covid 19 virus first arrived in the City of Miami -- there were many ways the citizenry made their feelings known abut the situation. Most notably, a groundswell of support for all the persons who worked in the first line of defense providing us with needed services at great personal cost.

One of the things which popped up in the downtown Miami skyline were several heart images on the sides of skyscrapers thanks to creative lighting on windows.

In the midst of terror, those symbols were a sign of hope, a sign of humanity, a sign of one thing we all have in common -- a beating heart.

Johnson & Wales Marriott Downtown Miami FL

Residents would stand on the balconies in the city at 8:00PM each evening, clapping their hands, banging pots together and in the case of one very determined singer, attempting "DEO" in the best Harry Belafonte voice he could muster.

The hearts added to the sensation, gave us all something on which to meditate, to think about love.

But for the last few nights, that heart is gone. 

Not figuratively but literally. Gone. Out. 

At first I thought it might be something going on with the construction nearby, so I gave it no thought the first night.

Tonight, however, several days have passed and I'm thinking so has the heart.

Johnson & Wales Marriott Downtown Miami FL

In other words, Miami has lost its heart, and the evidence is on the side of the darkened building for all to see...or actually not see.

Your heart is gone, Miami, gone. Someone decided to put out your lights, literally, apparently not realizing how many of us saw that heart as a beacon of hope. It was a  constant in a series of weeks where every day some new horror posed itself to us.

It was a reminder of life, of our own hearts, a bit of light in a very, very dark chapter of the city and our lives.

Who took out Miami's heart?

And most importantly, who will put it back?



Amen, and pass the hand sanitizer. 

COVID IS IN THE BUILDING

Okay, I suppose it was bound to happen.

Just sucks that it happened here.

We received an email from the building management that someone who lives here has a case of...roll them drums.... Covid 19.

The email is somewhat vague to protect the resident -- it's not clear whether he/she is alone in the space or there are others involved. I understand why this is done -- the more to protect someone from the inevitable vicissitudes of humanity. 

You know, someone doing something that's not very nice and ends up in a stupid post on some social media site.

I have to admit here that I am weirded out by the above statement in the purple box. We had another email some time ago about a patient in another building close by, but that seemed very far away.

This is close to home. This is my home, where I've spent week upon week doing all I could to prevent  Covid 19 -- aka "the scourge of 2020" from invading my space. It sucks.

But then it sucks for the person who has it, of course. We can only hope it's not a bad case and it ends well. Admittedly now everyone here will be even more on guard, let's assume. 

So allow me to repeat my mantra -- WEAR THE DAMN MASKS, PEOPLE, WEAR THE DAMN MASKS.

Amen, and pass the hand sanitizer. 

COVID 19: We Are "All Not in This Together"

One of the most inane messages that is being thrown about during this Covid 19 Era is how "we are all in this together." 

The idea that "they" are trying to shove down our collective throats is that somehow no matter who or what or where any of us are, we are sharing this common experience in a way that is very egalitarian. No, no. no. 

Lately our televisions are showing images of celebrities holing up in their respective homes, proving very visually that we are not in this all together.  The idea is supposed to be that these privileged and moneyed folks are putting up with the same difficulties that those of us who live in much smaller residences endure. 

Yeah, right. 

Take the Today show's Al Roker who presumably is broadcasting from home. So far I've seen a huge kitchen, an outdoor fireplace bigger than my bathroom and a sweet collection of vinyl in what I think is his living room. This shot of Al in his kitchen is notable for the huge stove and the collection of Le Creuset on the shelves.

Meanwhile singer Kelly Clarkson is broadcasting her daily show from her ranch in Montana, festooned with log walls, some horse runs and a couple of fire pits.  

The rest of us mere mortals are doing our level best to keep our cool in spaces that are nowhere like those residences. Those of us lucky enough, I meant to say, to have a home. Let's not talk about people who are enduring the Covid 19 era on the street of any city worldwide.

My point is this - I don't  begrudge any of these folks their nicely appointed digs. Hey, they worked hard for it and more power to them. 

But when I hear them tell me that we are in this together -- that makes me cringe. Al, Kelly, and all the rest of you - we are NOT all in this together. You are hanging out in spaces with every amenity you can imagine - and if you don't like that house, you have others to visit when boredom strikes. 

We are not all in this together, people. It's about time we stand up for ourselves and ask, no, DEMAND that the powers that be stop using that ridiculous statement when patently it's an absolute load of crap, and nothing will convince me otherwise. 

Amen, and pass the hand sanitizer. 

COVID 19 ERA: PUT THE MASK ON, PART 2

I can't believe I'm scribbling again on this same, lame topic.

The facial masks are now an ubiquitous symbol of the Covid 19 Era.  A couple of months ago I was calling it "the pandemic" like everyone else, but I've changed my tune on that. Humor me. 


This afternoon a members of the Miami-dade County League of Cities Mayor's Coalition (aka a boatload of South Florida mayors) held a press conference on Covid 19. Usually these things tend to be about the same sort of topics, not just in Miami but across the country: how many have died, how many are infected. 

Holding court today was City of Miami Mayor Francis Suarez, a guy who has a lot of my admiration because he tested positive for Covid 19 and posted video updates daily. As a former Communications Director for a Rhode Island politico, a guy I couldn't get to do anything which required personality, I was gobsmacked that Mayor Suarez did what he did. Not bad for a Republican. 

So when he said today that from now on anyone walking outside in Miami must wear a mask of some kind, I was rooting for him and any of the other mayors standing near the podium.

Wearing a mask has become a cause celebre for the intellectually challenged. Some monkeys think it's a violation of their civil rights, and fight like hell not to put the things on. One Floridian got into a wrestling match at Walmart (duh) because an employee told him it was mandatory to wear one in the store. The videos are all over the place and someday the Maskless Wonder may regret having one of his less than finer moments recorded for all time.

I have been wearing a mask from the get-go because I have a phobia about being close to an infected human who will sneeze and blow his/her snot all over my face. I recognize the mask may not provide a ton of protection, but the more we get into this Covid Era the more it seems that they might.

So as I said in an earlier post, wear the masks, people, wear the masks. There are a bunch of styles and colors to choose from and at least you can make the Covid Era part of your fashion statements.

And Mayor Suarez, thanks a lot, I mean it. 

Amen, and pass the hand sanitizers. 

COVID 19 - ONE MILLION PEOPLE DEAD

Did that catch your eye? How about the photo of the front page of The New York Times?

The last few days have been a media blitz about cities, communities, states opening up various parts of their locations to a lot of different things that have not occurred there recently.

Let's not get bogged down in the details, since they appear to be getting lost in the shuffle.

We see reports about people coping with eating at a restaurant, shopping in a mall, trying to get a haircut or doing some other inane thing which we all did before Covid 19 became a miserable part of our existence.

The news reports have changed in tone along with all this -- have you noticed there are now stories about accidents or building fires far earlier in the newscast than they would have been before? 

Front Page The New York Times 

It's clear that there is a paradigm shift. People are really really sick of hearing the same stuff over and over -- Covid can kill you, wash your hands, such and such a company is developing a vaccine and some politico isn't wearing a mask.  They are not paying the same amount of attention as they were about two months ago.

Even the nightly sessions of people clapping to honor all those who had to work during the pandemic have lost their gloss. You can barely hear the noise now. 

A friend of mine and I were talking about the likelihood that familiar has bred a different type of contempt -- so much so that we are no longer paying that much attention to some of the things we had paid attention to a few months ago. 

One of those things might be the amount of people that have died as a result of Covid 19. Those grim statistics have become ubiquitous -- just another part of the din surrounding this abject mess.

As the number of Covid casualties rises, will it become another of those things that goes in one ear and out the other? Just another casualty that we will pay scant attention to?

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.  

WEAR THE MASK I DON'T WANT YOUR SNOT ON ME

Okay, they are a bit annoying. 

The masks. They tug at your face, slip off your nose when you don't want them to and if you wear glasses, cause some serious fogging of the lenses.

But what they also do is provide some sense of "protection" against COVID 19 -- that blasted virus that we have all come to hate, detest, and want to disappear. 

If you go on any social media you will find a cacophony of crap written by people who keep telling you that they are wearing the mask because it is protecting YOU - not them. 

Then there are people squawking about how wearing the masks is a violation of their civil rights. Just how many of these people even thought about their civil rights before the pandemic is up to debate. I'm convinced some of them saw a post on social media and jumped on a bandwagon for an issue they didn't think about six months ago.

Whatever.

Bottom line is this -- we are up against a very nasty virus which has killed boatloads, caused havoc to untold others and stands to keep doing likewise until somebody from a drug company comes up with something to kill it, dead, dead, dead before it kills any more of us.

If wearing a stupid band of fabric across my face may keep my sneeze off you -- or perhaps some of your sneeze off me -- then I'm game. My civil rights include not having to deal with your snot landing on my face because you were too much of a jerk to wear a simple item of clothing.

Amen, and pass the face masks please. 

Corona Virus, Appendix & Anachronous Anaesthesia

There are two ways to think of an appendix:
1. a section of extra material at the end of a book
2. a tubular sac at the lower end of your intestine

Well, the second definition has no longer any meaning in my life. I am without an appendix, a preface or a glossary. Okay, I'll stop the book jokes.

It started in the middle of the night, like these things always do. I woke up feverish, my entire abdomen distended and myself feeling much like an overblown balloon. It didn't take long before my brain registered that something was definitely off - and after making a couple of calls to one of those online doctor services, it was time to act.

I got myself to the Emergency Room -- actually I DROVE myself to the ER because no ambulance was coming-- which in the middle of this blasted Covid 19 pandemic was a miracle in and of itself. I managed to screech "It's either my gall bladder or my appendix, people!" and somehow my bent over frame and twisted facial features gave credibility to my self-diagnosis.

One CAT scan later the ER docs proved that the useless appendage had ruptured (I keep saying it blew up because it sounds more dramatic) and I was in the OR where I went to that place you go when they give you anesthesia. I may have hollered at a couple of the guys in the OR not to drop me, but I am not totally sure.

Afterwards a couple of doctors mumbled at me in my semi-drugged state that my-former-appendix had indeed ruptured but not too spectacularly, which is why they handled things laparoscopically. Or so I understand. I asked to see the damn thing but they looked at me the same way the OR people did when I yelled at them not to drop me.

It's been a few weeks now, and I have a couple of pings here and there depending on how I get out of a chair or the bed. I'm about 98 percent okay, with setbacks on occasion when I just seem to run out of steam with very little warning. I consider myself damn lucky that during the Corona Virus pandemic I got in and out of a hospital with several ounces of myself missing and a few stitches.

After this whole thing I'm convinced that we should routinely yank out a person's appendix as soon as humanly possible. The damn thing is useless, does absolutely nothing except EXPLODE with no warning and then wreaks havoc. Wouldn't it be simpler if we just made a little cut and got rid of the appendix before it woke you up in the middle of the night? 

Amen, and pass the IV. 

CORONA VIRUS: DARWIN AND NATURAL SELECTION

It's a terrible thing to consider that as part of the Corona Virus/ Covid 19 pandemic there will be a side effect which Darwinians will tell us was coming all along.

Chances are that the stupid people, the ones who take chances and don't pay attention to common sense, will more likely die in bigger numbers simply because survival of the fittest is a fact. Ask Darwin.

It's all about natural selection. In theory, natural selection refers to the notion that the fittest, the strongest and most intelligent are most likely to survive and pass along their genetics.

This is a photograph I saw today on one of the Facebook pages. It shows numerous residents of a particular community all crowded onto a bike path during the middle of a global pandemic which is killing thousand of humans.

I present the photo as classic proof that Darwin and others who believed in natural selection are  right. 

These ninnies are outside and crowded together walking about during a global pandemic in which the Covid 19 virus is wiping out thousands of people with no end in sight. A killer virus.

Yes, killer.  You know, in which humans die after suffering a painful time being unable to breathe. And oh, yeah, begging for a ventilator to save their sorry arses even at a time when ventilators are scarce. 

The whole thing is based on the stupid notion that these stupid people have about fresh air. They are going to die if they don't get fresh air, will die if they don't walk outside surrounded by other nincompoops seeking exactly that same fresh air. That they could die by contracting the virus isn't entering their empty heads.

See the two in the middle? They have a kid. They are putting their child very much in harms way. Do that to yourselves, fools, but not your kid.

Somebody should report them to the Department of Children and their Families.

And the rest of you? Those walking on the path in search of fresh air? Think of the droplets that are hovering around -- droplets which could contain that virus. Those droplets could kill you. Natural selection strikes again. Darwin would laugh at you.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper. 

CORONA VIRUS: QUEEN ELIZABETH II URGES RESOLVE AND SELF-DISCIPLINE

I have never been a tremendous follower of "royalty," as in those people who are born with crowns and castles with moats. A lot of their activities, it always seemed to me, were a tremendous waste of money and resources. 

Counterintuitively, I have always been a staunch admirer of one member of the British Royal Family --- Queen Elizabeth II. Today, my admiration went up a notch. Again. 

In the middle of the Corona Virus/Covid 19 horror show, Queen Elizabeth II gave a brief and well written address to the UK and the world with respect to the situation.

Her presentation was simple -- an emerald green dress, three strands of pearls and the ubiquitous brooch. No need for bling during this somber moment.  

This is a woman who is 94 years old and has seen her share of life's ups and downs. While she spoke, her oldest son Prince Charles was recovering from his symptoms of the virus. So was her Prime Minister Boris Johnson who is now hospitalized because he's having difficulties breathing.

Never mind the thousands of Britons who were suffering from the virus or had lost their lives as a result.

Her voice was strong, her cadence perfectly timed, the length of time she spoke was sufficient. The Queen spoke that this time would define "our present and our future," and urged Britons to remain united and resolute to overcome the challenge.

"I hope in the years to come, everyone will be able to take pride in how they responded to this challenge," she said. "And those who come after us will say that the Britons of this generation were as strong as any." 

I'm a journalist by training and very frankly have very little trust in public figures, and when I hear a "speech" I often wonder who scribbled what words we heard from any of them.

Queen Elizabeth has her speech writers and of course consults often with her husband Prince Philip as to what she might say during one of these occasions. Did she write her own address today? The curt and simple sentences leave me to believe that answer is mostly yes.

Given the shenanigans by many of the political figures in the United States recently, I found myself hanging on to every word she said. There were no silly statements, no half-truths, no digs at anyone in the audience.

There were the words spoken by a woman who has been knocked down many times and gets up again, dusts herself off and keeps going. Let's not forget she is named after Elizabeth I, another feisty, incredible leader and historic figure. 

Would that some of our leaders here in the US took a page out of their "how to" book and channeled the energy of both Elizabeths. We could sure use it.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.

CORONA VIRUS: MY MOTHER WAS RIGHT

If you knew my late mother you would understand how difficult it is for me to write something that acknowledges she was right about anything.

My mother was ALWAYS right. You learned early in the game that arguing with her was a waste of time. Now I didn't say I went along with much of what she said - I, too, have my stubborn streak.

But these days I've been hearing two of her dictums so often that it's like she has come back to life and is haunting me.

WASH YOUR HANDS!  

DON'T TOUCH YOUR FACE!

I heard those words every single day an untold number of times. 

Now they are everywhere -- with good reason, as these two simple sentences are being counseled as one of the major methods to hold off that heinous, absolutely putrid Corona Virus/ Covid 19.

Somewhere I know my mother is shouting from the rooftops "Wash your hands! Don't touch your face!" a bunch of times a day. She's programming the planet to scream right alongside her.

Come on, you know you want to.

WASH YOUR HANDS! 

DON'T TOUCH YOUR FACE!

I never really got an answer from my mother as to why those two sentences were so important to impart to her children. 

But now, I get the idea, Mom, trust me. I'm doing as I'm told. And thanks a bunch. 

You were right.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper. 

CORONA VIRUS: WEAR THE MASK

First and foremost, I am not a doctor nor any type of medical person. Just an observer and writer of what is going on around me.

The latest twist in the ongoing Corona Virus/Covid 19 saga is whether or not people should wear face masks out in public.

At first the word was not to wear them and leave them for medical personnel for obvious reasons -- they are first in the line of fire. There is a shortage, allegedly. I certainly have not seen them on store shelves. 

The last few days, however, that story has changed -- like it always does if you pay attention. Now some are "suggesting" they be worn outside the house etc. In other words, some of the politicos have smartened up and trying to avert lawsuits down the road.

How clueless are you? Do you have to be told by some "authority figure" to do something which makes sense? If an elephant was running at you would you ask me if you should get out of the way or just .... get it? 


In my view anyone who went out of the house the last couple of weeks and did not wear anything at all over their mouth and nose are card carrying examples of people who will end up winning a Darwin Award.  In case you don't know about those, check here: Darwin Awards 


In this photograph I am wearing a 100% cotton squeaky clean kitchen towel. It's one of the "good ones" which only gets used as decoration so it is in mint condition.  

I'm telling you -- wear the masks and the gloves. Is it going to kill you? Probably not.

But the likelihood of something killing you if you don't wear masks and gloves are a bit higher.

Pay attention,  cover your mouth and nose.  Pretend you are hanging out with Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Whatever it takes.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.

CORONA VIRUS: APRIL FOOL

Yeah, you read right. Corona Virus: April Fool.

What a joke.

April 1 has long been a day in which pranksters, jokesters, clowns and silly people of all ages bring out their inner child.  The idea is to pull off a pun or joke on somebody and then when the person doesn't quite "get it" you yell out APRIL FOOL! and then look for another patsy.

This April 1, the entire human race is under an enormous APRIL FOOL type of episode, but it's not funny. 

It's not remotely amusing. 

I spent a part of my day watching news -- something that at another time of my life (when I worked in news) I did as routine.

Today I was looking for a snipet of information from Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. I was wondering when, if ever, he was going to shut down the state like a bunch of us have been pleading for him to do. 

That's so we don't end up with a bazillion dead people thanks to the spread of --- THE CORONA VIRUS! THAT FREAKING THING WE ALL LOVE TO HATE!!!!!

He finally did it this afternoon -- but only after nearly having to pull each and every one of the guy's teeth out of his head by a whole bunch of people higher up on the food chain than apparently the entire population of Florida. 

Dude, bow much do you want to be re-elected? 

Apparently, not much. April fool? We will see. 

Amen, and pass the toilet paper. 

CORONA VIRUS: WEIRD ENERGY

It's nearly sunset and the air is still in Miami, warm like a summer night.

Someone is playing around with a speedboat on the river, whipping by like a bat out of hell. The image is unusual, given that the city is currently going through some changes with respect to the Corona Virus/ Covid 19 scenario.

I am sick of it, but then again who isn't sick of this blasted bug. It's not as if there was anything to like about it from the onset, and now that it's been part of life and the lexicon for a bit it's even more sickening.

The power boat appeared to be heading away from the downtown section, probably going to dock at some point since there is a curfew in the city and a shelter in place scenario. That to me translates as "you are not going to have a lot of fun, people" tonight or any time soon. And that translates to what I"m calling the Weird Energy, this sense of impending doom that is floating above us all like the proverbial Sword of Damocles.

When I say "weird energy" I mean a sense of confusion about what it is that the average person is going about doing or not doing. There is no protocol which is the same everywhere -- a lot hinges on the local politicians and the diversity of those plans is incredibly wide. 

From what I can see, there is NO plan. There is just a bunch of "leaders" with Weird Energy trying to take a stab at something when some serious and hard decisions have to be made.

People if you want to beat this thing you have to make some hard choices. You are going to have to focus on something other than what is on Netflix tonight and how you are "coping" with hanging around your own house for over a week. 

But from what I can see many of you can't, many of you are doing nothing other than floating around without any real sense of what YOU need to do -- and REALLY DO -- to make sure things get back on the right track.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.

CORONA VIRUS: MIAMI NOISE

A couple of days ago I scribbled something about the eerie silence that had fallen over Miami on a weekend night. 

Yes, once again we had to thank our new favorite friend the Corona Virus/ Covid 19 bit of slime that has been so much a part of our lives lately.

Miami is a huge city, for those of you who have never been here, it goes on and on and on. And there are a whole bunch of different sections -- many of you see photos of South Beach and the deco hotels and figure the buck stops there.

But it does not -  that's Miami Beach not to be confused with the City of Miami and a whole host of other communities.

I'm not digressing - just making sure you comprehend that the noisemakers this evening were none of the residents of the Downtown Miami/Brickell Avenue/Brickell Key area, which is a residential and business neighborhood. Lots and lots and lots of apartment dwellers.

I got an email inviting me to applaud from my balcony around eight tonight.

Of course, knowing this neck of the woods the way I do, I figured it wasn't going to be just some polite clapping.

It was some howling, some clapping, some banging on metal railings, and a whole bunch of people trying to get the Harry Belafonte theme "De-oh" going.

A fair amount of noise for a first shot, and I can imagine tomorrow and in a few more days my neighbors and I will get our acts in gear and be heard in Fort Lauderdale.

Just be warned.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper. 

CORONA VIRUS: ANTI-SOCIAL MEDIA

Social media with respect to the Corona Virus / Covid 19 is starting to get grim.

The subject itself is of course incredibly interesting -- there is not a person alive that can state this is not one of the most fascinating albeit terrifying items we have coped with during our collective lifetimes.

But how certain people deal with social media is beginning to have a negative effect in contrast to what the poster is trying to accomplish.

Go on Facebook at any given time and you will find basically the same things:

• folks blathering about how badly the President is handling the matter
• folks blathering about how well the President is handling the matter
• the latest prognostication of how many will die
• the latest prognostication of how few masks/personal equipment is available to the first line responders
• the next city which will have the dubious honor of being the epicenter
• the next politico who tries to shut the borders of his/her state to keep idiots from bringing the virus into their neck of the woods

I could go on but won't. We are all sadly picking up way too much information on this matter because the damn thing is not going away anytime soon.

I've been ignoring social media a lot, particularly Facebook. It's annoying as hell. You have those who are fighting with everyone else about the stupidest things. You have those who honestly believe much of what is on there even though it's clearly drivel.  You have those who quote the last thing they heard from some pundit whose show airs in Nebraska or Wyoming at three o'clock in the morning.

And you have those who are "dropping out" and announce it to everyone as if it's something that will cause us to lose a lot of sleep. Kids, I'm not and neither are a lot of others.

Facebook is a truly dopey method to pass along information that really matters. You don't like someone's posts? Drop them for thirty days. They will never know.

Get anti-social with your social media. You will feel a lot better at the end of the day.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.

CORONA VIRUS: IT'S HERE, STAY HOME AND WEAR THE GLOVES

All of these are in no particular order.

Stay home, this is not a vacation. You are "working from home" because there is some serious shit going down. Got it? 

If you are thinking of visiting Florida, take it from those of us who live here -- we don't want you. There is a reason why Disney closed -- it's keeping the bulk of you visitors out of here and giving us a better chance of fighting this beast without your germs to make things worse.

When you go to the market, don't float around looking at everything and taking your sweet time. Go in, do your business and get the hell out. There are others who want to get in and chances are they are waiting in line to enter the store.

Get ready now because the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020 will happen at the store near you.

If you are one of those who did visit Florida for spring break, and are now apologetic about it, we still think you are an asshole. 

There is a reason why a lot of people are wearing masks when they go into a store. Can we be sure they (or a bandana) work? Not necessarily but given that everyone is wearing one, who are you to decide not to? 

And by the way, if you don't live in one of the hotspots, and hear from someone who does -- remember these people are feeling the threat far more than you. I know the feeling because that is the case with me and all of my neighbors - we spend the bulk of our time in the house now.  

Remember, in a few weeks that could be you. Stay home. Wear the gloves. 

Amen, and pass the toilet paper. 

CORONA VIRUS: DON'T TOUCH THE CHINESE PACKAGES

I'm going to be very bad here.

I am going to rat out a local TV reporter who apparently had NO common sense during her standup.

Those of us who work(ed) in TV news know that reporters are supposed to do this thing called a "standup" in which they park themselves in front of something while giving out information.

The "standup" is the lynchpin of the piece -- where the reporter inserts himself/herself into the story and gives an extra bid of advice or illumination as a result.

During today's 11:00AM broadcast of the Miami NBC affiliate, this chick (photo included) did a standup.

The story had to do with medicinal supplies arriving from China I believe in South Florida. HERE IS THE VIDEO: LOOK AT HER BARE HANDS. 

There she was -- in a red dress, touching the boxes with her bare hands several times for emphasis.

I'm saying it again -- SHE TOUCHED THE BOXES WITH HER BARE HANDS SEVERAL TIMES.

I could not take it -- and of course called the station. They were very grateful.  I did work for an NBC affiliate once in my life and have some loyalty. But there were several people who were responsible for her mistake.

First, her. Second, the videographer. Then the person who edited the video. Then the producer/director who used it as part of the newscast. And of course anyone else at the TV station who saw it and had to be in the ozone layer not to notice.

Let's no think of how many people that dynamic duo came into contact with during the duration of their day.

If I were news director at that station, you would all be having a very, very unpleasant evening tonight. You would be shaking in your shoes. And all of you would be written up. No questions asked.

So to the entire staff at Miami's NBC6 - DO NOT TOUCH THE CHINESE PACKAGES.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.

CORONA VIRUS: MIAMI - THE SOUND OF SILENCE

I can't help it, the sound of silence is coming through loud and clear today and it's not the Simon and Garfunkel song.

It's Miami, the city of Miami, now under both a "shelter in place" and a city wide curfew. It has resulted in an eerie, otherworldly Miami -- one that is more than just asleep. It's in a coma.

When I was a kid visiting Miami, one of the things I could not understand was how damn noisy the place was. I grew up in a tiny town where nobody screamed, nobody made anywhere near the noise Miami generated in just a pocket of itself, never mind the whole enchilada.

And as I got older, at first I looked down my nose at it. Until, that is, I got older still, and started appreciating the noise. And added to the hoopla. 

Damn, Miami, damn. 

I realize why we are all doing this, keeping inside the house, keeping to ourselves in hopes that we crush this freaking Covid 19 virus that any one of us mere mortals would love to strangle, crush, squash to an unrecognizable pulp. 

And then, Miami, you will come to life, again, my friend, now my home. You will make noise, because I will make noise for you. I'll stand in my balcony and holler my lungs out to make up for this creepy, crazy silence that is hovering over you.

We will all make noise, Miami, we will all make noise again. Believe me.

Until then, Amen and pass the toilet paper. 

CORONA VIRUS: IT IS WEDNESDAY (HUMP DAY)

It is Wednesday.

I had to put that on my Facebook page today -- dawned on he halfway through the morning that I had completely lost track of what day of the week it was.

I don't by any stretch of the imagination pretend that the last day or days have become so boring that I have paid no attention to them.

I don't want to say that I've lost track of hump day, that mid-week moment in which you realize that the weekend is just not that far away.

However, this Wednesday is falling on as yet another of the now ongoing series of Corona Virus or Covid 19 days in which Earth is held in the grip of an absolutely abominable, albeit tiny, terrorist.

So I'm not going to forget this one in particular, definitely going to keep in in the record books even though for a nasty bunch of reasons.

But as life continues, as it will, and hopefully this damn virus gets blasted into oblivion, I'd like to note that someday, someday soon perhaps, Wednesday will become as yet another mundane occurrence which we may actually forget.

For the moment, however, it's Wednesday. It's HUMP day, the day we again kick that blasted, awful Covid 19 critter out, out, out.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.

CORONA VIRUS: FEAR OF THE SUPERMARKET

Fear.

I got up this morning and experienced something new for me -- fear. Fear of going to the supermarket.

I'm not what you would call a wallflower. And naturally this whole Corona Virus is a mighty tough scenario for everyone who lives on earth at this juncture.

But this morning was something else -- I wanted to go pick up a few items at the market and I realized that I was dreading the whole experience.

An infinitesimally small item -- the universally hated Covid 19 -- was freaking me out to a degree that I thought twice, no several times about doing what is really a very routine task chez moi.

Usually on market days I throw on some sweats and run into the car, driving quickly up the road. 

Today, however, I had to think about the outfit I was going to wear for the job. I picked out a long sleeved shirt, leggings, socks, a baseball cap, sunglasses and a pair of yellow rubber gloves. And of course, the ubiquitous item to cover my mouth and nose.

I looked at myself in the mirror and realized I looked like a bank robber, tucked away and hidden behind all of that clothing. It's a lot of layers for Miami, especially today when the temperatures had already climbed pretty close to 80 degrees.

At the market many others were dressed like me, or a variation thereof. The fear was that someone, anyone, would possibly sneeze or cough and one of those "droplets" filled with the dreaded Corona Virus would be airborne in my direction. It would "land" on me, it would "infect" me, and I could potentially be one of the many victims of a minuscule threat no human could see with the naked eye.

Yes, I was afraid. But that's what this "global pandemic" has reduced all of us humans to -- we are threatened by something that is like the sword of Damocles, albeit invisible, something which hovers over all and casts a dark, ominous shadow over the entire human race.

Fear. Never have I dressed for the part. And as a human, never have I wanted so badly for something so small to be afraid of me and disappear from where it arrived. 

Out, out damn virus. 

Amen, and pass the toilet paper.

CORONA VIRUS: SIX FEET

I've always been amazed at the relative lack of education in the bulk of the populace. I'm not talking about how many years someone has spent in school, by the way. Education to me is a mind well shaped, a thinking being capable of figuring out the basics.

Apparently there are a whole bunch of people that have no concept of how to measure a six foot space.

As part of the Coronavirus plan of attack, people have been told to stand six feet apart from each other. The notion is that this would help prevent contamination should someone sneeze or cough. Well, at least that is the theory. I know a few people who when they sneeze could possibly send droplets into orbit.

During my walk today I could not help but notice that people were meandering terribly close to me, way in violation of the six foot edict. They ran by me, sweaty on top of it all, wearing their ear buds and in their own mind space with no concern about the other humans on the walking path.

In other words, totally clueless. 

We are going to have to come up with an easier method for these dimwits to figure out how far to stand from other people during these Social Distancing Days. Let's call them SDDs.

The easiest way? Stick your arms out on any side of yourself and don't let anyone within that circle. 

Think of DaVinci's Vitruvian Man.

Here he is in all of his glory. I'm not going into all the different facets of this iconic figure and why he is perfection. 

But I am going into the idea that we all take a look at him, stand with our arms out and not allow anyone to come within that distance from us. While Social Distancing seem to be the words du jour, I would not be surprised if after all of this is mercifully over we will finally grasp the notion of personal space and no longer run into each other as we stand in line to purchase items at the market.

Got it?

Amen, and pass the toilet paper. 

CORONA VIRUS

It's like a bad movie -- the entire planet is in the grip of an unknown virus which is spreading like the proverbial wildfire. 

Humans are in a panic -- in this case hoarding toilet paper and hand sanitizer, among other household supplies. And it's not a joke.

Tonight many of us are experiencing an eerie silence in the communities where we live - as community leaders have encouraged the citizenry to avoid being in crowds and coughing into their elbows. Let's not talk about the five million instructional videos on how to properly wash one's hands. 

Starting today I will scribble down my thoughts without too much editing -- and allow this to serve as my own record of an insidious horror nobody on earth has experienced before. 

I'm located in Miami -- but I will be filling in with thoughts on news I may hear from friends elsewhere or else rants with respect to what the politics are behind all this.

On most Sunday nights, my neck of the woods is somewhat quieter than Saturdays. Families have come back from numerous activities and are now readying themselves to go back to work or school.

That's not the case tonight -- the silence is palpable and a lot more people are at home than they usually might be. Airplanes, which are a staple sound during the twilight hours are few and far between. 

A loud and lively city is shushed and subdued. Scary, too.

For the record, I fervently hope that this ends quickly and as painlessly as possible given the parameters.

Time alone will tell.

Amen, and pass the toilet paper. 

NBC DEMOCRAT DEBATE WAS A CHICKEN FIGHT

I just finished watching the latest NBC Democratic Chicken Fight -- oops, Debate, and definitely this was the most entertaining, but not in a good way.
  I"m not sure what the moderators -- Lester Holt, Chuck Todd, Hallie Jackson, Vanessa Hauc and Jon Ralston were smoking prior to the event, but man, were they a tepid group! 

These are the people who are supposed to ask questions, to reel in the candidates if they go too much in the direction of Golden Retriever puppies and run down the road with their tongues hanging out.

But that was a moot point -- very early in the game the whole thing got completely out of control and the candidates all talked over each other again and again. The zoo keepers -- ahem, moderators -- who were supposed to be controlling the animals clearly were in over their heads on this night.

It's ridiculous to think that in a network -- NBC -- could not put together a less lackluster group? Lester Holt in particular was out of his element -- he's the main anchor for the occasion and you could just barely hear him here and there.

The kicker is these people -- and I'm sure Lester in particular -- are getting some big bucks. 

Were I Noah Oppenheim -- the head of NBC News -- I would already have called all of these moderators, put them all into a little room and ripped them new ones before they went to bed tonight. Ruffle their feathers, so to speak.

Noah -- I may send you my resume. I'm bored with what I'm doing lately and could use a change. Not to mention, I could do a lot better. Trust me. 

Amen, and pass the mustard. 

MEGXIT BREXIT EXIT SO LONG HARRY AND MEGHAN DOES ANYBODY CARE?

First and foremost, let me state for the record that I do not have a single drop of so-called Royal blood. Although I will add here that I never quite understood the rationale of clutching such a title in this day and age. 


Two members of the British "Royal Family" -- Prince Harry and Meghan Markle  announced recently their apparent desire to pull a Brexit and leap out of the fray for at least a portion of the time. The pair has gone far enough to establish themselves as a "brand" for marketing purposes. It's called sussexroyal.com 

Reports say the branding includes clothing items and assorted other things. I have visions of pajamas with crowns all over them eventually turning up at Savers when the sales pass.

Their website incidentally states that they will continue to use social media in an updated approach which will enable them "to share more, with you, directly."  I never realized I was so important!

The website also states that they "value the ability to earn a professional income" and that the current structure prohibits them from doing just that. The rumor mill is floating around a statement that Oprah Winfrey did not counsel the two, though that's not hard to believe. Now that's a financial juggernaut to emulate.

One suggestion about professional income Harry or Meghan may consider -- Taco Bell will be paying some of its managers a six-figure salary. 

So in keeping with that theme, here is my statement: (and yes I've ripped some from the Royals)

"After many months of NO reflection or internal discussions, I have chosen to make a transition this year to carve out a progressive new role in some #institution. Who knows which, I've yet to decide.

I intend to step down as "senior" member of no family in particular. This should allow my circle of peeps to figure out our next chapter, whatever that is.

I will also work to become financially independent. I'm going to draw some ideas from Harry and Meghan, neither of which currently have a "real job" and derive most of their income from Harry's father, Prince Charles. If anyone wishes to establish a GO FUND ME so that  I can carry out this hallucination you are welcome to do so.

I may opt to spend some time with any of my Canadian friends, since they are a hoot and a half. That goes especially for you Anne Keiver.

I won't mind if Harry and Meghan allow me to use some of their castles for part of the time when they are not using them. I really dig one with a moat, by the way.

A tiara would be nice too, but nothing too flashy.

And by the way, Oprah, call me when you get the chance.

#RoyalFamily #PrinceHarry #MeghanMarkle #TheQueen #Brexit #Sussex 

Bruins. Celtics, Patriots. Red Sox. WINNERS ALL!

It seems that everyone is yammering about the fate of Tom Brady and naturally, the Patriots -- with good reason of course.

Those of us who hail from New England have become accustomed to watching the Brady bunch win over and over again -- and it's not easy to think that an era may be coming to an end.

But at times like these we must gain strength from just how spoiled rotten we are living in the land of  incredibly winning teams.

Bruins.

Celtics.

Patriots.

Red Sox.

Think about it -- when one of these teams is having a so-so year, one of the others seems to pick up the ball in another arena and go for a win of a different flavor.

While we sit and chew our nails wondering what the outcome of the Brady/Patriots saga will be, let's remember one thing -- ALL of our New England teams are historically huge winners in all sports. It may take us awhile (like the Red Sox) but we get the job done and always will.

It's who we are, New England, it's who we are.