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Tuesday, December 20, 2011


My apologies in advance that I'm about to revisit one of my former rants, but when you see your life flash before your eyes, it's time for a re-rant.
To the woman in the white SUV who nearly crammed the front end of her behemoth into the rear of my little car: GET OFF THE ROAD YOU IDIOT and yes, I shouted.
There are people who should never be allowed to drive a vehicle of any kind, and she's one of them. Via my rear view mirror (where I was staring in a major panic thinking this dumb bunny isn't ever going to hit the brakes) I saw that she was engaged in lively conversation on her cell, simultaneously fishing around the passenger's seat for who knows what.  
Meanwhile my eyes nearly popped out of my head as she careened closer and closer to me (we were at an intersection and the light was red) meanwhile searching out of the corner of those eyes to see if there was any way in Hades I could scoot out of the way in the seconds left to me before the BIG BANG happened. 
Mercifully, someone was looking out for me because she stopped short, her own eyes opening wide and then she slumped back into her seat.
When the light changed I rolled down my window and communicated digitally (the old fashioned way using one of my fingers) just exactly what I thought of her. 
The kicker? As she turned the corner I noted various marks and bruises around the bumpers of the truck and ironically, one of those "Baby on Board" signs flapping on the window, which only meant that she had made another dingbat just like her. 
And I didn't have kids? Heaven help the planet.
Amen, and pass the mustard.

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