SUDDEN SUMO SATELLITE SPLATTER

First, I need to qualify that I have an unabashed admiration for NASA, which unlike many governmental agencies really does deliver a lot of bang for the bucks.


However, these great folks have let us know that in the coming day or two or three, large chunks of their Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite (UARS) may crash land on assorted, as yet unclear, parts of our planet.


Yep, satellite splatter.


The news sites are all a-twitter over this idea, and at this juncture so am I, especially when you consider that the UARS weighs about six tons -- roughly the size of a bus.

Kisenosato Yutaka

Now those cut ups at NASA, who love a good joke like all the rest of us, assure us that the UARS won't be landing all in one piece, thank goodness. It's likely to break up on re-entry, and they speculate that these hunks of space junk may range in size from the miniscule to some that could weigh more than 300 pounds.


That's like having Japanese sumo wrestler Kisenosato Yutaka coming at you from above at hundreds of miles per hour, without any prior warning other than perhaps his shadow looming overhead seconds before he lands. 


With apologies to Mr. Yutaka, that's not something any normal human should have to experience.


But worry not, NASA claims there is one chance in 3200 that any of these pieces will land on you.


Amen, and pass the mustard.